FML

[DjGhettoSteve]

Today, while on the crapper, I learned that morphine has a nasty side-effect. It appears that it can cause a massive roc-hard piece of dung the size of a bus to form in your intestines. I went to the doctor, he handed me a glove and some laxatives and said “Have fun!” FML


Today, I stumbled upon my girlfriend’s Twitter account that I didn’t know existed. A recent entry states that living with me is pathetic; “it’s just that the current economical situation doesn’t leave her with many options.” FML

Today, I just let out all my feeling for a woman that I have loved for 22 years. When I finished she said “You’re so funny” and walked away. FML

Today, I woke up very hung over after a big party last night/ As I walked into my kitchen to make something to eat, I noticed a weird smell. Turns out my friend had thrown up in my freezer, and then turned off my whole fridge so “it wouldn’t freeze and be hard for me to clean up in the morning.” FML

Today, I found my little sister picking her nose in the bathroom and wipping them on my toothbrush. I asked her why she was doing that. Her answer, “Daddy told me to.” He did. FML

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend when he decided to role play “burglar” using a knife. Skeptical, I joined in only to realize that a bouncy bed and a sharp knife don’t mix. He ended up piercing my boob. The fun part? Explaing to the doctor how the injury occured. FML

[Disorder]

Now that's a shit storm.

[Cloudkicker]

Dude, when i first read this i thought you where talking about YOU taking a duke! :puke:








not very lady like! ;)

[Cha0s By Design]

Dude, when i first read this i thought you where talking about YOU taking a duke! :puke:

not very lady like! ;)

same here Lol I was thinking "wow thats pretty graphic for a lady" haha

[rolfmonster]

goddamnit, I already read this in unaudio.com

[jCole]

Uhhhhhh
(http://sidewaysfive.net/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=11)

[Cloudkicker]

goddamnit, I already read this in unaudio.com


Pick One....

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_mXbzYOBo_dA/RuGAgbXd2MI/AAAAAAAAAFg/dOITb1EHvRw/s400/RedBluePill.jpg

j/k

[rolfmonster]

Pick One....

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_mXbzYOBo_dA/RuGAgbXd2MI/AAAAAAAAAFg/dOITb1EHvRw/s400/RedBluePill.jpg

j/k


LOL, NO

[DjGhettoSteve]

lmao! no, not me taking a monumental crap... here's a few more...

Today, I was on cloud nine when the beautiful waitress I frequently ordered takeaways from told me she didn’t need to take my name as she remembers me from before. When I got my food I saw the sales slip. On it she had written, “Cheeseburger – Fries – Coke – nerdy guy with bad haircut.” FML

Today, I went outside to enjoy the cool air without my glasses. I saw my neighbor doing the same, so I waved and said hi. When she didn’t respond, I yelled and went back inside. It was only later when I went back out with my glasses on that I realized I was being ignored by a Halloween decoration. FML

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled : "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

Today, I thought it would be funny to fart in my roommates mouth while he was asleep. I walked over to him and pulled my pyjamas down and let loose. To my surprise it was a very wet one and I accidently took a dump on his face, he woke up and beat me until I was bleeding. FML

Today, I finally convinced my husband of 8 years to partake in a threesome with a guy that works with me and for which I have developed feelings. Everything was going well until in the heat of the moment my husband started performing oral sex on my colleague. I can't face either of them now. FML



FML OF THE DAY!!!!!


Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML

[KayceeFace]

oh nm

[DjGhettoSteve]

same here Lol I was thinking "wow thats pretty graphic for a lady" haha

I SHOW THE THREAD TO MY HUSBAND, HE SAYS "WELL, YOU WOULD SAY IT LIKE THAT IF IT WAS YOU"

YAY, MY HUSBAND VERIFIES I'M AS GROSS AS A GUY.... FML...

[M.I.J.]

don't yell at us while posting other people's most disgraceful moments


(seabreeze5 or foxforce5, whatever.. doesn't even have cap lock friday... yet)

[DjGhettoSteve]

don't yell at us while posting other people's most disgraceful moments


(seabreeze5 or foxforce5, whatever.. doesn't even have cap lock friday... yet)

lol, sorry, just in meme-mode... stupid not having memes setup http://www.thescubasite.com/smile/animated/anim_09.gif

[rolfmonster]

CAPS LOCK FRIDAY WAS ON THE OTHER BOARD THAT DAVES NOT POSTING ON ANYMORE

[DjGhettoSteve]

CAPS LOCK FRIDAY WAS ON THE OTHER BOARD THAT DAVES NOT POSTING ON ANYMORE

WELL DAMMIT I LIKE IT, DAVE OR NO DAVE... :P